WOW! Where does the time go? It seems like a month ago I was ringing in 2012. I can remember my Dad telling me the older
you get the faster times flies and man was he correct.
What was 2012 for you? Was it great, sad, happy, crazy or all of the
above? As I look back it was a year of
change. I left my secure job of 17 years
and moved to another city. That is scary
if you have never done it. I left some
of the most important people in my life behind.
Even scarier. I have branched out
on my own for the first time as well.
Scarier still. And during every
phase of this the one rock I have had to hold onto is my darling wife. She has been there at every turn with nothing
but support and unconditional love for me and our situations.
2012 also brought a slight peace to me about my son. If you have read one post here more than
likely it had something to do with him.
Well in 2012 I decided I had done all I can do. If he doesn’t want me in his life then he
gets what he wants. I can’t imagine my
life without my Father during the years he is living right now. My dad was a wealth of information and advice
that kept me from even more pain and suffering than I brought on myself. However as much as I try my son will do
whatever in his power to make sure he defies anything I stand for or
suggest. So I have removed myself from
his world and allowed him to do and be whatever it is he wants. Hard? You
bet. Necessary? Absolutely…
2012 took me away from my Memphis family. This was the hardest thing I have ever done
and am still battling it every day.
These people have taken me in and supported me loved me made me a part
of something that was so much bigger than anything I have ever been a part
of. My Adopted Sister whom I speak of
often in this blog is my greatest lost.
You never understand how much someone means to you until that person is
gone. I find myself reaching for the
phone to call her or thinking about dinner plans with them only to realize the
harsh reality that they aren’t here. I
can’t tell you how much I miss our dinners, birthday parties, or impromptu togethers,
the fake arguments, the always picking at her that I do. It was a huge part of my life and I never
realized how important that was to my happiness and sanity. Let it be known I miss her madly.
2012 brought new members as well babies Eden and
Jade were born to the most loving family I have ever seen. They will be loved and cared for unlike any
other children I know.
2012 also brought a new frame of mind for me as well
I think. As I get closer to the
retirement stage of my life I always thought I would be fearful or getting
older. Even as we speak now I have just returned from the doctor’s office which
I go to now with greater regularity than ever.
Yet I am unafraid and understand you can’t live like I have for 58 years
and not need a tune up every now and then.
So what will 2013 bring?
For me only happiness is allowed in 2013. I was once told the only thing you can pick
is your attitude. In 2013 I choose only
a good one. I pledge to be a kinder
gentler Blessed Man this year. I also
choose to be a better husband to the woman who put up with all of my trails in
2012. I also choose to be a better
adopted brother and not fight so much with my older
sister!!!! Even if she is really younger…..I
also choose to allow my son the room to be himself even if I can’t stand the
thought of it. And lastly I choose to
live every day to the fullest taking time to smell the roses. I will go through 2013 like a dog with its
head out the window. Face in the wind
and wildly happy. So roll down that
window I am getting in your lap and we are going on a 12 month drive 2013…
May 2013 see the answer to any of your problems
solved. May it bring you peace and
happiness to your heart. Here’s to a
wonderful 2013 for us all, after all we weren’t even supposed to be here
according to the Mayan’s….
Peace,
The Blessed Man
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