Monday, September 6, 2010


I was in an account of mine last week and we started talking about time, in the real sense. Kind of a pseudo quantum physic thing. Yes, the conversation was over my head, but the guy I was talking to was smart enough to dumb it down so I could semi-understand. That conversation got me to thinking about time as it relates to me and mine. I am in the stage of my life where I think more about retirement than ever before. As I look at my starving 401k and the economy in general I wonder if I will ever realize that dream.

Lately the wife and I have been kicking around the idea of making a few steps in that direction. Looking for a few acres somewhere it is safe and warm, with mild winters, and long lazy summers. I am a water guy, always have been. Not that I don’t enjoy the mountains, or the rolling hills, I just like the water or near it at the least. The wife is a major water person so we are leaning in that direction. You don’t have to be able to explain Quantum Physic to a guy like me to know beach front is a large investment and then I wouldn’t have my garden area either. So we are talking about a short drive to the water and a little land for me. I think we can find exactly what we are looking for. I have one major problem, my friends and Memphis Family. How do you box up the people you love more than life or persuade them to come along on your dream? I can’t imagine any of them sharing my dream of a small farm with chickens, a cow or two, big garden, a pond for fishing, maybe even a river close or running though the land. Sounds pretty nice huh? Well not to all. One thing about my Memphis family is we are all different but all share the same unconditional love for each other. How do you move away from that even if it is your dream? Aren’t you supposed to share your dreams with the people you love? And how can it be a dream if my Memphis family is not included?

I guess that is what they mean when the old timers said time waits for no one. Time is always moving. Nothing says we will or we won’t find our dream place. And nothing says we are moving tomorrow. However, the thought of it makes me very sad in some ways and excited in others. I know people move and change. There is about to be a big change in the family very soon. My adopted sister is about to have her first Grandchild. I know the pecking order is going to change. I know there are going to be things change because of the baby. I get that, and have no trouble adapting to it. But no one is moving, we are all still here, she is a phone call away, just like I am, just like we all are this very minute. Are the visits going to be fewer, more than likely for a while? Will the baby take center stage? Absolutely. Will we all still get together of course? So, time is moving on. It brings babies, and houses, and happiness, and joy.

So when you think about it, I guess time has been a friend to the ole blessed man. Look at all of the things I have been blessed to share in my life. Many of the things you have read in this musing of my experiences. There have been many more, too many to write about even. So I guess Mick Jagger had it right when he sang “Time, Time, Time is on my side. Yes it is”. So as I sit here and write this today I am very proud to be a guy who loves time and embraces its every change. Time has been an ally to me. It heels hurts. It allows love to grow where sometimes the ground is not so fertile. It educates and makes memories. It softens hearts hard with pain. It allows people into your life that over time, make a place in your heart you never imagine existed, and once they are there, you never understand how you even breathed without them being there before. It makes you see the good in people when you allow it to work to open your eyes. Time expands you as a person, to the very edge of your reality, making you understand that no matter what you do, or who you are, you need others in your life to be fulfilled. Time is my friend and treasured companion.

Well time will tell what happens to me. I know one thing, there is no battling time. I will allow it to work, as it has for my entire life. Trusting it to be my friend and always having my best interest at its very core. So here we go, the train is leaving the station right on time. Come along for the ride if you like I can promise it will be filled with joy and wonderful times. Just like the times of my life have been to this point. All Aboard!!!!!!


The Blessed Man

Wednesday, September 1, 2010


What were you doing 32 years ago? Think about it, 1978. I started working at the airport at my dream job. I had been married for 3 years. I weighted a lot less than I do now, and I thought I was Teflon. My Dad was still working at the airport, so I was working at the same place as him, I was the coolest guy. Disco was rolling, and dancing was the thing. I had some of those stacked shoes and some pants that John Daly would not wear today!! Live was good. Well on August 30th that year a marriage happened. It was not unlike any other at the time, but man was it a special thing. You see my claimed sister got married that day, and 32 years later she celebrated it with us all. I didn’t know her then and she didn’t know me. She has since met some of my friends from that era and says she would not have liked me to much back then. I guess we all change, at least I know I have. Her, I am not so sure. I have got to believe she is still exactly like she was even back then. A cheerleader, and of course the best looking girl in school, she is the one everyone could understand. She is the one that spoke to everyone and seemed to get along with everyone, what a talent. She married a guy who, like me, I think maybe had a little bit of wild in him. But she saw the diamond in the rough and married him anyway, and what a great choice on her part. He had been a magnificent father to her 4 kids, a tireless partner and supporter of her., a welcoming soul for her father and mother who have, and still live with them. What a guy. Let’s think about that last statement. He has lived with her parents their entire 32 years of marriage. Could you do that? Her Mother has passed but her dad “Tone the Bone” has lived with them for the entire 32 years.

As we sat down for dinner, on their special night, her dad “Tone the Bone”, got up to make the first toast. His voice always seems so strong until, he starts talking about her. He just can’t do it without getting all emotional about it and then we all get that way. He started out with he has lived with her for her entire life. What an accomplishment for a father to live with his daughter all of her life. He has seen it all the birth of the kids the death of his wife and the growth of us all while living with his heart and soul, his daughter, what a blessing for Tone. He spoke of how her husband has become a son to him, something the husband will tell you without a bit of prompting, he loves Tone like he was his dad. He spoke of the children and his wife and how they all just have grown together and how special the entire 32 years has been for him. As we all sat there I wondered what that must have been like for them to spend 32 years together and still be so in touch with each other and have each other’s best interest at heart. Seems like something in today’s world that is extremely rare. How blessed am I to even be at this table, much less, to consider these people my family.

As I look back over that same 32 years I can see things that were great, and things I would like to forget. However, I only have one regret; I wished I had been at that wedding! If I had been, think of the joy and the fun I would have had enjoying all of the things Tone spoke of during his toast. Were there bad times? I am sure. But as it always seems in life the good times seem to be ones we always talk about and remember. And trust me there have been a ton of good times in this family. I have seen the videos!! The boys when they were younger tag teaming the family dog, a boxer named Rolex, and the dog actually pinning one of them to the living room floor. The young daughter kissing the little boy next to her during a school program until he actually walked to the other side of the stage! The speech the son gave at his high school graduation, because he was the class president. The football games at UT where the two sons were cheerleaders and came running out on that field carrying the UT flag, the wedding in North Carolina, the announcement of the upcoming grandchild, the engagement of the oldest just a week ago, the pending engagement of the daughter. Seems this family is a joy attractor. What a 32 years! May we all have this kind of impact; not only on our own children, but those we call our friends as well. I think I am a better person for knowing these people. They have changed my life in ways they will never know. I love each and every one of them and truly think of them as my family.

Wow what a 32 years. Makes me want to go put on some KC and the Sunshine Band put on those Stacked Shoes and dance!!! Wait a minute, I would pull every muscle in my body and I have to work tomorrow!! So I guess I will just be thankful that I had shared the last, oh say 8 years, with this very special group. And it’s not every day you get a sister out of the deal either. Love you angel, thanks for the memories.


The Blessed Man