Departure

Well it has happened my dream has come true, so to speak. My son just left for the next chapter in his life, in a far away state. He pulled away from our house, car loaded to the gills, and Lady Gaga’s Bad Romance blaring!! What a picture. One I am sure I will not soon forget.

I wished him luck and told him he could be anything he wanted to be and whatever that became I would be proud of. Don’t know if it meant anything but I felt like it was the right thing to say at that moment.

So it begins; the journey which has been funded by my wife and me with an infusion to get him there and feed him maybe a week. He left talking about opening his own restaurant with his chef buddy down there. Wow to be 22 again! All I think about now is how can I retire. But that’s what 35 years will do to you for sure! I am excited in a way to see exactly how he is going to react to being on his own. I remember the first night I spent in my own apartment and thinking this was the coolest thing ever. Then in 3 weeks the rent came due, then the light gas and water bill. Then the phone bill, car insurance, well you get the picture but that is the last thing you think of when you are enjoying you success over the world for that first brief and, please pardon the word, stupid moment before reality sets in. I wish him that feeling when he gets to his destination.

I guess in reality I have been the gate keeper in his life for entirely too long. He has tried everything to get out of the pen. Now I simply opened the gate. I had a dear friend send me something the other night after I showed my ass at the dinner table. It went something like this. You cannot stand in front of someone and stop them from living their journey. You must step aside and allow them to go and live their life. It hit me like a ton of bricks. I was standing in front of the gate and this boy/man has been trying to get out for a long time. Now I think he enjoyed the safety net for sure and doesn’t yet understand it is gone. But none the less I was keeping him from his journey. Well he is on it now and I wish him luck. I, like everyone other father will one day do, now stand back and let this man go into the world for the lesson that are taught there. They are always hard and painful but so important. The things that do not kill you make you stronger and I have a feeling I have just turned, what will be, a very strong man out into a very unsuspecting world!

So I am telling you all he is on the loose and traveling about with his own mind and ideas. Teach him what you have taught me. Family is first. Friends are your life. Children hurt you more than anything or anyone else in the world. As a sidebar; I will never forget when my mother held my son for the first time she was looking at him with a look only a grandmother can have. I asked you don’t love that baby very much huh? She smiled handed him back to me and said these words that have never rang truer than at this moment in my life. “That little thing right there will bring you more joy than you will ever know and can hurt you more than anything or anyone else in your life. Welcome to my world” As I sat there holding this tiny little child I looked down and tried to think of the times I had hurt my mother and of course nothing came to mind. I simply could always remember the happiness and love she had for me and I her. I am sure she spent many a night hurting because of something stupid I did but never did she mention it, WOW. That’s unconditional love. I guess now I just hope one day I can forget all of the hurt he has caused me and only remember the good times, like my mother did for me. Talk about a mother love, man!!

Well you have been warned! I have given notice he is on the way and ready for whatever comes his way. Teach him well and allow him to become a man we will all be proud of.

Good Luck my son. And as they say in Ireland “He who loses money, loses much; He who loses a friend, loses more; He who loses faith, loses all.”

Peace,

The Blessed Man

Dance

What’s the picture, in your mind, if someone said dance to you? Would it be that first frightful experience standing there against that wall watching the girls dance with each other petrified inside yet dying to ask one to dance with you? Is it a picture of a lovely lady in a Tutu moving gracefully across a deserted stage to beautiful classic music? Or is it the experience itself? You and the person you love taking to the dance floor to your favorite memory of your courting days?

Well I can tell you what it will mean to me for the rest of my life. I am in a very special place. A place called “The Villages” it is in Florida, middle of the state, no beaches, no waves, no amusement rides, just golf courses, swimming pools, and golf carts everywhere. This is an age restricted community. You must be 55 to own property, and they are selling more than houses here they are selling a lifestyle, and one I really like. But you can read about that online if you like here is the link to their website, The Villages.
Every night, on two town squares, they have live music and dancing. Last night my wife and I were at the Square closest to own home for the week. We were sipping our wine, people watching, sitting in the shade, and having a blast. We noticed a couple dancing, him a rough and tumble salt of the earth looking man, head full of white hair. Her a grandmotherly looking pure soul, white hair to match her beau’s, denim skirt and white cowboy boots. As the music played they moved almost as one around the square. Each step as if they had done it a thousand times before. With every step they became the center of attention not only for us, but all in the square. Gliding around each other they were totally lost in the moment and I truly believe they didn’t notice any of the 200 people enjoying the show we were all being treated too. Lovingly he held her hands and with each turn and dip he always had her, she would never have to worry he was always going to be there. What a treat to see. By the time the music stopped they were the only dancers. As the music stopped and they hugged each other the entire square erupted in a huge round of applause for them. Almost embarrassed they shyly nodded their heads in a sign of their gratitude and moved back to their chairs hand in hand. They had to be pushing 80 if not passed a bit. That is what makes this place special.

We were talking to a couple next to us and they were talking about a study that was done on this community. The results were that people who lived here and participated in the active lifestyle lived and additional five years!! I can remember my dad always saying it is quality of life not quantity. And these people have quality to the max!!

Heaven would be to live here and have my Memphis family with me. How selfish is that. Wanting to uproot my family from their other friends and family to bring them here so I can be happy? Well that is just how I feel!!

So I guess we had better start looking at houses! No I think we need a Cul de Sac for all of my family.. Wait a minute they are playing our song! I had better go get my wife I think it’s time to Dance!!!!

Peace,

The Blessed Man

Decade

Wow has it been ten years since Y2K? What were you doing the day that everything eas going to crash? I remember we rented a house called Tannenbaum on Greer’s Ferry Lake in Arkansas. There were six of us and we cooked a meal to remember and all watched as the world changed into the year 2000. I remember thinking as I watched the Eiffel Tower explode with fireworks what a special night this was to be alive. We cooked a meal for the ages as well Steak Lobster and everything decadent you can image and the wines were off the chart as well. What a night and the Y2K deal, a flop, kind of funny when you look back on what everyone thought might happen.

Now more importantly what did you do over the last ten years? Me, a lot, I finally talked the woman of my dreams into marrying me. I expanded my career to new heights I didn’t know were possible. I have developed a much closer relationship with my son, much closer than we have ever been. I think I am a better friend now. I have returned to going to church and have found a whole new group of people I have grown to love and depend on. I have definitely gotten older. The knees hurt, the back hurts and I like to sit around a lot now. I have really never been a sit around guy. Now it is nice to light a fire, when it’s cold outside, or sit by the pool with a book, when it’s hot. I used to love to play golf when it was hot now, not so much. I still love golf just when the temp is below say 90.

As I look back over the last ten years I can count more blessing than anything else. It is humbling to see what has been given to me. The people who keep my work, my family, my life and basically me going are a constant source of blessing and fulfillment. I don’t want to sound strange but my entire life has been blessed for more than 10 years.

So as we entire another Decade may your life be like mine, if that is what you want, happiness and joy. And hopefully to good lord will give me the grace to pass along as many of the blessing he sends me as I possible can.

Have a blessed 2010 I kind of know mine is going to be hopefully yours will be too.
Black-eyed peas and turnip greens for me, I wonder what goes better with Turnip Green, Chardonnay or Sauvignon Blanc??? Let’s just open one of each after all we are blessed!!!!