Well
here we are again the day I am not sure exactly how to feel. I feel a hole in my heart because I miss my
Dad. I also feel a hole in my head
because I feel like I have failed my son so badly. But that will only be determined at the end
of my son’s life I guess. I truly feel
like I have had no influence on him at all.
Time will only tell.
However
there is a story to be told here. I have
just spent a week with my adopted sisters Grand Son, Jax Ellis. What a kid!
He is funny and now is two. We
all know what two means it’s just another word for NO! What a pleasure it was on the first day to
watch his father my sister’s second oldest son.
His loving ways were so apparent with young Jax it’s so wonderful to
see. But then you think about his mentor
and father and you know there was no way he could be anything but the best day
ever. You see his father, my sister’s
husband of 30+ years, is one of the most dedicated dads of all time. He loves his kids and will do just about
anything to make sure they learn the correct lessons in life. He is so talented at knowing exactly when to
give in and exactly when to stand his ground.
All of his children simply adore him, as do I. As we say in the south this apple didn’t fall
from the tree. Jax’s dad is one great
guy. Jax will be a smarter better young
man because of the family he was born into.
As I posted when young Jax was born he has been blessed beyond anything
he could have wished for.
This is
the first Father’s day where 2 of these families’ sons have kids of their
own. It has been such a pleasure to
watch these young people turn into great young adults and parent as they start
their lives as parent. Each having
parents that have taught them values and important lessons that they will be passing
along to their young ones. I guess I
will live through them watching and enjoying their young ones every chance I
get. I was just about blown away last
week when young Jax came running over to me and jumped up in my lap. Something no child has ever done in my
life! I was so taken aback by his
actions. I can’t describe the feeling for just a second I was able to
understand how my adopted sister must feel every time she is in the room with
her grandbabies. The pure emotion and unconditional
love that little boy in my lap was giving to me at that moment was like nothing
I have ever known. Warmth I know every
grandparent must feel. It was special to
say the least. Thanks Jax for giving this old man a moment to get it and finally
understand a little bit of the grandparent thing. Now I have two granddaughters that I love
dearly. They are older and much more
independent. They are sweet and fun to
be with. They are much closer to their Mimi
than to me and that’s cool I still enjoy watching my wife and the girls dance
and sing and act the same age. I have become closer to them through things and
events of late that are another post altogether. I am hoping they are coming for a visit
sooner rather than later.
So I am
still confused about this day. I
remember looking forward to this day when I was young because we allowed my Dad
to kinda do his thing on this day. More
likely than not he worked but my Mom would always cook his favorite meal us,
the kids, were always on our best behavior because this was Dads day and a day
we thanked him for all of his sacrifices he made every day of his life for
us. I sure wish he was here to let me
thank him one more time and to try to figure out where I when wrong in a
department in which I had such a good teacher.
I guess
I need to count my blessing here and not look at the bad. I have 2 great grand kids. I am blessed to have 3 others I will adopt
like I did my sister. And how can that
be a bad thing? If your Dad is here call
him, hug him, and tell him how important he is to you. I can’t tell you how it feels to have those
feelings and not be able to pass them onto the person who makes them happen in
your heart.
Peace,
The
Blessed Man
